Sunday, April 11, 2010

THE FOUR LETTER WORD.



Love- it is not merely a word. It’s an emotion. One of those which is impossible to predict. You can never ever justify this feeling. You can never explain why your heart beat suddenly accelerates on seeing someone. Yet love is also one of the most natural feelings, example, a mother’s unconditional love for her child, love for your friends, pets... the list is endless.....


Every place shouts the presence of it. Movies, magazines are full of it. Love stories, which are bestsellers. How can one not get inspired/influenced by this? There have recently been incidents in my life which have both strengthened and weakened my belief in love. Also this topic in itself is so complicated, that I was sceptical as to whether or not I will be able to do justice to it. But I had to take this load off me and also I had promised a friend of mine that I will write about it. Now I seriously have no idea as to what exactly I am going to write about... but have to start, so ......

I ll begin by the story of a guy, who loves a girl from the past three years. The girl however refuses to acknowledge the fact and the guy. The guy refuses to give up. The situation now is that the guy has just one ambition left, and that is to somehow or the other get her or just talk to her some way. Career, hobbies, friends ... all these things hold no meaning to him. Everything is just about that girl. He keeps talking about her. Keeps on making plans to somehow just talk to her. His whole life is centred around her. Sometimes I feel, she is all he’s living for and at times I fear she is the one he could even die for.



This guy happens to be a good friend of mine and I care about him. Sometimes I get so clueless as to how should I help him. What should I say to make him feel better? What should I say that does not sound like a cliché?”I cannot live without her”. How to reply to that. Who is at fault here, the girl the guy ...who? And what exactly is this thing called love..? You meet someone and suddenly your whole being is around and about that person. your days are gone thinking about them, wondering how great it would be to have them around.... is this what love is...? This longing, the need to be together, .........!!!

And even when you are lucky enough, and your feelings are reciprocated, what happens then...? Naturally, everything looks heavenly. Life is suddenly beautiful. There is no greater source of happiness than knowing the fact that there is this special someone, who constantly cares, worries about you. Reminds you constantly, how special you are. Your days and nights belong to them and you feel you have attained the most precious gift ever. But love doesn’t come with a guarantee, there is no permanence.



Coming to another story, a love story straight out of the pages of mills and boon. Innocent love, not knowing the true realities of life. Lovely beginning, great start, perfect understanding. When the couple attained stability and settled down, there were suddenly cracks visible in spite of the strong foundation. It seems like love left them. There is nothing to talk about. The long never-ending, pocket-emptying telephone conversations are now a thing of past. The initial hellos are followed by uncomfortable silence and ended with formal talks. No endearments. Now what went wrong here....everything was so perfect, so true, just like a fairytale...

But as they say “life is no fairytale”. The harsh reality is that, even when two persons are committed to each other and practise fidelity, things can go wrong. Distances occur which are impossible to bridge, like two banks of a river. There was a time, when every detail of “what all you did the whole day” was disclosed, but now you call only because of habit. The communication gap at one point of time gets so huge, that you realize that the person you at one time loved is now nothing but a stranger.




It becomes so difficult to take a step towards improving your relation. Always waiting for the other person to make the first move. And when the other person fails to do so, thinking “if he is not bothered, why should I care”. Small problems change to bigger ones and the distance keeps growing.

Amidst this enters a new person, who suddenly gives you attention and appreciation. You would go towards that person like a piece of iron towards the magnet. However hard you try to stay away, make promises with yourself, it becomes impossible to think rationally. When the person you love criticises you, has no time for you. That new person gives the required comfort and a great boost to your self-esteem and self-confidence. Is this cheating....? Infidelity...?




Do you even realise the fact that what you are doing is wrong, does this fact register in your mind..? It’s injustice to yourself, your partner and that “new” person. Then what to do....? What is the right thing to do..? Go back to the place you receive no respect, or break all ties and set yourself free...? I know there are “n” number of solutions available... just Google it and you ll be spending rest of the day reading great answers to your queries. But how badly I wish it was that easy. In reality when you are under such a situation (or for that matter any situation relating to love) your brain refuses to acknowledge the solution or the easy way out (saying this on basis of personal experiences...!!). Maybe it’s true that love is synonym of suffering...!!

So what exactly is love....? does it exist or is it just a gimmick. Is it popular only because it’s all over the movies, and it’s kinda “cool” to say that I am in love...? I am still in a dilemma. Hope I get my answers soon....!!
For then
keep loving ...!
I ll like to end the post by quoting a line by someone who’s been there and done that...
“Don’t confuse love with desire
It comes from the ashes of desire”.

p.s
I think this is my longest post...!! (:D) ohh god this love...!!

39 comments:

  1. I really liked this one not bcoz f d 1st para but as u gave a full analysis abt luv its good n bad both aspects wr given in ur blog but it was too lengthy but very nyc u really changed my view abt luv... :-)

    ReplyDelete
  2. if u knw y u like somebdy,datz merely a LIKING....bt wen u dunno d reason...datz called LUV....
    p.s. noni...noni....noni...

    awesum post...

    cheers..!!

    ReplyDelete
  3. @sepo: woh pehle wala ws boring...
    nyc idea ;)
    :D HAPPY.........

    ReplyDelete
  4. Wonderful post
    Love exists. It shows it self when you care for someone, like a mother for her kid.
    It shows when you miss someone, like me missing my family.
    It exists but as they say in nature everything is balanced, so the goodness of love is balanced with possessiveness, insecurity, infidelity and many more.
    The guy is in the first case should not be so selfish.
    Fine he din't get the girl but he holds some responsibility towards his mother, father and siblings. If he gives up on his career and life then in a way he just telling his parents that it doesn't matter to him what all they did for him, what all they sacrificed for him.
    Everyone leaves, we should remember that.
    Even our parents will go away forever one day. We will cry on their death but we won't stop living. we will accept our lives without them. This guy has to do the same.
    In the case of the girl, she should have chosen to explain him what all is bothering her.
    Giving him some time to think over what he did.
    Remember how hard was it for you girls to give you barbie dolls to someone else.
    Just a non living thing, but your most loved thing. So won't it pain the guy is he see's his girl taking more interest in someone else. The right way is to introduce that guy to him, if that is not possible than keep sharing stuff.
    Guys always get insecure, and only his girl can make him fine, back to normal. The guy should be treated in special way. Shouting and hiding is not the way. If still he doesn't understand then you have to take some harsh steps. But, before that, make sure you tried your level best to get things back to normal.
    About the mills and boons story.
    Breakups sometimes are good
    My first relation had no future and somewhere deep inside we both knew it. She realised it before i did. Having some foresight is always good before getting into any relation. Otherwise the breakup hurts either one or both.
    But as i said, life goes on!!!!
    nice post there sneha

    ReplyDelete
  5. @ harry
    dude i m glad i did that...!

    @ eksha
    alrite girl :)

    ReplyDelete
  6. @ surbhit
    thnx a lot for appreciating. i respect and totally agree with your views on this.

    and urz is the longesttt comment i have ever received :)

    ReplyDelete
  7. last two lines r absolutely beautiful..hehe..whole post is wonderful..but just i mentioned last 2 coz i liked it very much...btw..hey friend..dont use sir yar..make me feel old, i am just turning 23 next year..heheh..or shall i start calling u "maam" best wishes always friend

    ReplyDelete
  8. @ r ramesh
    thnx buddy
    and no need for calling me maam

    ReplyDelete
  9. beautiful post....
    i appreciate ur view on love :)
    i was thinking to make a post on this love..but then lots of busy schedule was
    thr..cudnt post it..
    ab to main aapki hi idea ko chura ke kuch na kuch likh dunga :P


    "There is no greater source of happiness than knowing the fact that there is this special someone, who constantly cares, worries about you. Reminds you constantly, how special you are."
    this line is absolutely right....:)ye mera khud ka anubhav bhi hai...kabhi waqt mila to aapko apni kahani b sunaunga :)

    ReplyDelete
  10. Classique ! You know.. you brought out the 'whole' thing just so completely and beautifully ! And for the 'un-reciprocating' girl..

    "Love someone who loves you endlessly.. 'cause someone you love might not be the one for you.. but the guy is already there for you without even your slightest gesture of affection toward him" - Dhruv :D

    ReplyDelete
  11. @ abhi
    i would love to listen to your story :)
    and thnx a lot.

    @ dhruv
    thnx and will pass on the suggestion :P

    @ vandy
    thnx

    ReplyDelete
  12. thank you God for making me wise enough to not base the four letter word on the platform of gain and expectation and togetherness - or else I'd be sitting here gluing the pieces of me together!

    loved this post btw !!!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Loved your post Sneha. It was beautifully written. For the first time I see someone giving both the good and the bad aspects of love.

    Expect to read more stuff like this in future from you.

    Take care and keep smiling :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. oh god there's lot to learn from you
    ....love guru
    nice post .......no doubt but you have taken too many words to explain the four letter word...

    ReplyDelete
  15. @romeo
    thnx a lot. means a lot really :)

    @ jk
    thnx buddy :)

    ReplyDelete
  16. damn you got me excited for a minute there. when i read the title i was expecting a rant with lots of words beginning with F but well...so are u in love sepo? let us know soon ;)

    ReplyDelete
  17. :) .. I could only manage to smile after the post !!

    This is what I think love should be like!! :)

    Will be reading rest of your posts too, before I follow you .. see you on my blog .. Take care!

    ReplyDelete
  18. hey sneha,
    simply brilliant..a true manifestation of love..
    i too strongly feel that love should be free from the shackles of expectations..but the human nature is such, we tend to become a prey to this maayajal.:)
    brilliantly expressed..keep on riting..
    and yeah, my next post would the answer to your questions, for which i was tagged..:)
    cheers@

    ReplyDelete
  19. @ pan
    lol lol lol
    yea i m in love with my life and my beloved blog ;)

    @ sourav
    thnx

    @prithwish
    thnx buddy
    waiting for your next post :)

    ReplyDelete
  20. reactions....derz nothin cumin out rt nw..love...ds 4 ltr word shwz u d wrld actually....wat shud i say....love hz soooo many shades afterall...pain pleasure,joy belonging,sepration,hapiness,smyl,sadmess,tears,endless gestures f love tend 2 complicate ur lyf...lucky r d onez hu get deir love bt luckier r d one hu retain it....!!

    p.s. ds issue jus cant b resolved...!!

    ReplyDelete
  21. hey my dear..
    check my post...answers to your questions..!:)
    thanks for tagging..loved it..

    ReplyDelete
  22. i read the post heading and wished the four letter word should be anything but love but i was wrong:) , i thought it may be LIFE, F**K, BLOG etc etc...:P

    ReplyDelete
  23. exceptional post !!
    got the link thru abhishekz blog ...

    your blog is beautiful with good posts :)

    ReplyDelete
  24. though my past experiences tell me to denounce the name of love and all its complexities, i find myself in its bitter absence, helplessly thirsting for it.. better to have loved than to have never loved before? great post!

    ReplyDelete
  25. wonderful..nice post.. again and again
    satguru-satykikhoj.blogspot.com

    ReplyDelete
  26. OK OK no worry dear friend..when u come to dubai, will prepare special idlis for u..and this time it wont burn off...hehe.cheers

    ReplyDelete
  27. फिर से ये पोस्ट पढ़ लिया, और इस बार कमेन्ट भी...ई दिवु(दिव्या) यहाँ का कर रही है..उ कैसे आई .. :P
    खैर अच्छा लगा इस पोस्ट का रिविजन मारने में :)

    ReplyDelete
  28. i cn see a ray ff hope nw ...aftr reading this 1...feels great

    ReplyDelete
  29. I dont know what to say... coz I dont know how , why, whatever you're writing is just replica of my thoughts, replica of what has happened in my life, replica of what i used to tell my friends.
    Hey Thanks yaar...
    I can't comment on love , its just feelings and what i'll write would be just same as what you wrote above.. and now i'm sure that feelings which i have are out there in others heart as well... You are really awesome... ;)
    Thanks for the post... Thanks a lot...
    - Maddy ;)

    ReplyDelete
  30. boy in stryped pyjamasFebruary 5, 2012 at 12:21 PM

    soul touching and one of my favourite posts... no one can conclude the first story dat u mentioned of ur friend.. may b v are experiencing the same... lets c how the ending goes..then may b one can draw sme conclusions.. c m trying..

    ReplyDelete
  31. boy in stryped pyjamasFebruary 5, 2012 at 12:27 PM

    y do girls av a habbit of keeping guys in confusion...or may b they keep us guessing.. plus in my case she doesnt want to meet me at d first place but after a lot of efforts even if she gives me 5 mins to meet..tells me dat she doesnt love me and to piss off....but in d end it is followed by a hug.. dat drives me crazy..

    ReplyDelete
  32. I know this web page gives quality dependent articles or reviews and extra
    material, is there any other web site which provides such data in quality?



    My webpage: cellulite treatment cream

    ReplyDelete