Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Soul Curry

I have always been a sufferer of what is popularly known as the “lazy-do-gooder” syndrome. The scenario wherein you have many ideas on doing a good deed. But the ideas and plan are never brought to action because of sheer laziness and the very popular chalta hai attitude.

When I was at home my mother was regularly suggesting me to give my old clothes to our domestic help. I always ended up shouting and giving an excuse on how busy I was and did not have any time to go through my stuff and search for clothes to give out.  A few clothes out from my overflowing wardrobe were not going to make me deficient in any way but they would help our helper loads. I knew it. But I refused to act on it simply because a search through my wardrobe seemed like a Herculean task to me. Hence I kept procrastinating by saying a simple Ok. Again and again. My mother still did not leave hope on me and tried to pursue me into doing this good deed some way or the other try. But I would not budge. Moreover she also told our helper that Didi is going to give her a lot of clothes, hearing which she would look into my direction and shyly smile.

When I think back, it makes my heart melt. I don’t know under what workload I was back then that I couldn’t even spare a few moments for this minuscule task. If my memory serves me right I was a big prude back then. Not caring much about other and their needs.

I was brought to shame by no one but my helper. She had gone to her native place for a few days. When she was back, she came shyly in to my room holding a little something in her hand. She handed over the pack to me saying “Didi, yeh main aapke liye laye apne gaon se, pta nahi aapko pasand ayega ya nhi” ( I have got this for you from you village, but I am not sure whether you will like it or not). I was speechless, so much so that I could not even mutter a Thank You.

I opened the packet to find very pretty glass bangles. What I felt at that time was a mixture of gratitude and guilt. I have never been able to forget the look on her face when she was handing me package. Full of apprehension, a slight unease and shyness. Over the next few days I couldn’t even face her properly and felt overtly ashamed of myself. She had thought of me when she saw those bangles (she must have been aware {by noticing} the fact that I loved wearing bangles back then). I had never been considerate of her and she was silently analyzing my likes and dislikes all this time.

She taught me a very important lesson that day. No good deed does ever go unnoticed. It affects someone/something one way or the other. What else can I say apart from the fact that my heart is filled with warmth of appreciation whenever I see those bangles. So go out and bring a smile on whosoever’s face you can. Talking about myself, I am a changed woman! No. I kid. I am still overcome by those terrible bouts of laziness. But yes now that i am way from home, I make sure to carry my old clothes for my helper and also buy her little something’s from here.

P.S The helper’s name is Neelam and she is getting married soon.
PP.S The title of this post has been ripped off from the Sunday edition of TOI (Times life) which used to be a regularly featured column on Sunday’s and focused on the close to heart life changing experiences of readers. This post was originally written for the newspaper but sadly never got published.