The Blame Game

As is with everything else in this country, the current crisis too has been oscillating into the very common playground of politics and blame games. How each section of various groups is using tragedy of common people to build a vendetta, settle scores and pave a way for their future alliances and benefits. It’s the Kumbh mela Vs the last year Tablighi jammat. People are comparing numbers and deaths to prove which one was deadlier. Its political rallies. One party condemns it but that doesn’t stop them from having one of their own the very next day. There is oxygen shortage in hospitals but somehow at the same time there are also free oxygen langers. People are hoarding medicines and life savings drugs and selling them to the highest bidders! Not only this ambulances are charging anywhere between 10k to 50k for distances less than 10km. Crematoriums not to be left behind are also using this opportunity to earn some extra bucks.Talk about making money at the expense of someone’s life. Even things like thermometers are being sold at double their price. I have first-hand experience to this. My thermometer broke and when I called the local pharmacy, he started by saying he had none, gauzing my need and desperation. Towards the very end of the conversation he very casually mentioned that he may have a one but that would cost double the amount. I just did not know what to say. I kept thinking about how if a simple thermometer was open to such bidding, how difficult would it be for the Remidesivir’s and how actually were poor people helpless against this open robbery.

A lot of people and countries have been donating, but have people for a second thought about whether their well-intended gestures are bearing any fruit?

The big private hospitals I hear are hoarding beds and “discharging” patients only when they get a big amount from the rich. Everyone is questioning how government has let them down, no one questions are state leaders or for that matter the people. People are still fighting with each other on how the government they support is wrong. I was apalled at some comments directed at the death news of a journalist who was apparently from a pro government news chanel. The comments were on a picture of him, with his 2 little daughters and people were actually celebrating his death, calling him and his family names. At this time when the country is burning, people are dying - the hatred in the comments literally took my breath away.

People have conveniently forgotten about how they openly flouted all rules, refused to wear masks, had one big party after the other, weddings with no proper SOP followed. I have actually witnessed people laughing and saying how paranoid we are for simply masking or asking to wear a mask or for sanitizing. 

What we don’t understand even after this shit has blown out of proportion is that we ain’t anything. A miniscule virus has shown as that. Plan all you want, do whatever you can but everything can come to a standstill. All your carefully curated plans, all your expensive clothes and shoes, nothing matters. Just stay humble. Stop fighting over petty politics and over Politian’s. All of them are the same. Take care and help each other. Stop believing everything you read or listen in the news. Whether its from a pro government channel or otherwise. Don’t let powerful people sitting at powerful positions sway your opinions. Let humanity be above all.

Double mask up!

Stay safe.

Love:

Sepo

Staying Sane In The Times Of Corona

Last year around this time, newly into the changed world of lockdowns - fueled by the dalgona coffees and all the baking/cooking, I had started to write about things this virus and the subsequent lockdowns taught us. 

Me back then, baking cakes & breads at the drop of a hat!

It was a very positive post about how little we need to survive. And how we are destroying the nature and environment around us by increasing the carbon footprint. To add more on to the topic, I decided to wait a little longer as I was pretty sure - there would be more learnings and experiences to share. Somewhere down the year, the write up got lost amongst the huge list of drafts sitting in my laptops/ phone/ dairy/ back of the shopping list.

Exactly one year later - we have somehow found ourselves in a situation quite similar if not worse. But this time around the virus has wiped out every ounce of positivity from me. The news, social media, general conversations just about everything is centered around the virus. And with that comes the sheer helplessness that surrounds each of these news pieces. The line of ambulances, the lack of beds, oxygen and medicines in hospitals, about how people are not even able to bid a proper farewell to their loved ones. All this has just drained out the living hell out of me.

Plus I am sure now everyone has encountered this virus from pretty close quarters with atleast someone in the family, amongst relatives or friends or colleagues having tryst with this shit of a disease. Of late I have heard about so many sudden deaths from friends and family. And now with the new development of it being airborne the panic and scare around it has multipied.

Personally, all this negative news from everywhere is just making me anxious. Away from parents and loved ones, cooped up inside, same sort of routine everyday. I am sure everyone must be feeling quite blue. Although I am not really an outdoorsy adventurous type who is out partying or going on vacations. Even without covid I am mostly happy being home with a nice book and a strong cuppa coffee. But being taken away of even the option of going out is I guess what is making me restless, sleepless and panicky. Our residencial block is a containment zone with covid patients left, right and center. Since we have been advised to avoid the lifts - It has been weeks since I have even stepped outside the main door. 

Reading is helpful. Getting transported in the story in unfamiliar locale is helping even if temporarily. My bed has become my favorite place to be. And my shitty shit pcos has made my anxiety and mood swings worse than ever. And also my acne.

Now in order to stay sane, I am doing everything thats making me happy. Planting a new plant, applying nail paint, eating a whole pizza all by myself, staying the fuck away from news and social media, reading a lot of books, spending my time scrolling through good reads, waiting patiently for juicy ripe mangoes, following a skincare routine, avoiding these new shitty movies and series - this one story in a latest movie which I made mistake of watching had a scene of putting a baby in a pressure cooker!

These are not normal times. You see even the most strong people buckling under pressure. Depression and anxiety is at all time peak. We recently had someone committing suicide in our team. A perfectly happy jovial person with a toddler. And I guess thats when i realized how we hardly know what goes on in a person's mind and life. We choose to judge and comment on people. We formulate a image of people based on what they share on social media. But reality is different. A person may share a picture of cake they baked, but may feel hollow inside. 

Lets stop being judgement. Everyone has their own battles. Lets help in whatever capacity we can. Help your domestic helps. Pay even if you are not calling them to work. 

Meanwhile I read this article about things that ease out anxiety - it suggested re reading and re watching helps ease out anxiety as you already know the outcomes. So no more of these Ajeeb Dastans for me. I am gonna be watching re runs of .... No not FRIENDS, Gilmore Girls :) 

Coffee, books and some sass. That's exactly what I need right now.

One last thing! Mellisa MacCarthy  in Gilmore Girls was so much cuter with all that extra weight... one more reason to not buckle under the pressure of conformimg to society's idea of beauty and ideal size. 

Phew.

Stay happy and Stay home y'all 

And get vaccinated whenever you can!

Love:

Sepo

The Unfulfilled Resolutions

I had a teeny tiny resolution for last year. To keep this blog updated,  one post per month. Despite the shit storm that the last year was, I managed to keep up with this resolution right until the end. But I faltered toward the very end - the December month post got missed and messed up. And I got so  disappointed that it took me almost 2 months to start writing again.

So, the thing is that I actually had everything planned out for the last post of the year. It was a topic very close to me and since it was a  flash back post - I had all the artifacts keep ready and a draft all set in my phone for a long night of editing. But then I lost my phone. And before you ask no I did not take the backup.

Since I am a procrastinator, all this prep was obviously towards the very end of the month. Next 2,3 days were spend in crying over the lost phone, FIRs, duplicate sim quest and search for a new phone. By this time I was totally drained out of any creative energy and with the draft and artifacts all lost I would have to recreate everything from the scratch.  But for the sake of my resolution, I still planned to write atleast a little something to kind of conclude the year. 

Cut to the last night of the year,  I am working, ah yes and watching Rockstar and planning to write a quick post right after I finish my office work. But just like it was 12 and I was still knee deep in my office work. And the window for my last post of the year was gone, and with it my resolution. In hindsite it was probably not right to spend last night and first few hours of a new year doing office work, coz ever since I have just been working non-stop. Anyhow other than not writing I have spend most of the new year working like a robot, stealing in some time for book reading, a little bit of netflix, zero exercise with has resulted in couple of extra killos straight to my tummy and a lot of pimples.

Now last year is gone and have already lost 2 months for the 1 post per month resolution to be successful.  So we will come up with an improvised resolution for writing whatever and whenever irrespective of whether it makes sense or not. 

The blog for the longest time has been my personal space to vent but as I have started to share it with more people,  I feel like I have lost the freedom to say and write what actually is on my mind. I already have a very people pleasing, non confrontational personality, my writing and this blog was specifically to let me vent out, share what's actually happening inside my brain while I just smile and nod my head.

This year it will be more on speaking err writing fearlessly.

Cheers to that!

Stay safe and wear a mask.

Love:

Sepo

Throwback Post - For the Love of Red

This post was first published on the blog sometime in 2011 or maybe 2012. I had recently been bitten by the fashion blogger bug, and spent a lot of my energy in designing various looks around a single piece of clothing. At this point of time my blogging and blog were quite a hush hush affair, with only my closest friends knowing of its existence. As luck would have it, my tryst with fashion blogging somehow coincided with my darling sister somehow stumbling upon my blog. Fiery phone calls followed and I was strictly told to take down a number of posts and also the blog. Though I put my foot down for the blog I did take down the so called fashion posts. I wasn't too happy with the meddling back then, but in retrospect I am quite glad it happened. In my sister's defence the post she first saw was "5 ways to style a boyfriend (oversized) shirt" and most of the looks consisted of ahem just the shirt and a belt.

Anyhow, now that throwbacks are such a thing with pictures I thought why not do a throwback post. I had hard deleted the other ones but I couldnt for some reason delete this particular one where I styled my red pants multiple ways. So enjoy my old narratives and mediocre pictures.

Here goes:

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Red they say is the color of power but for me it is a color that shouts out FUN! I remember the day I bought myself the Red Pants. We were out shopping for a friend and I spotted them staring at me from a basket. They were on SALE in Westside and the price at which they were available was totally unbelievable. So I took a chance and tried them on, it was that OMG moment when you realize that finally these pants fit and how! They were perfect in every way - price, style, size so there was no reason for not buying them. So I took another chance and bought the Red Pants.

They sat in my cupboard for a considerable period of time but the moment I wore them for the first time, there was no looking back. I fell in love with them and the addiction is such that every time I go off to shopping I make sure that all the Tees that I buy match with my Red Pants. So all the latest shopping material is Red Pant compatible. My love for this look with Red Pant is so dire that I decided to dedicate a post to it. I guess this would be my first post in the genre of Fashion Blogging!

I apologize in advance for the image quality, yes it is that bad ....

This pic is special because it is from the first time I ever wore the Pants.

This is with black with the famous matching of Belt and shoes.

Isn't it adorable the way my pants and couch match!

This is the same white and red combination worn with different shoes and hair !

This is my favorite look, as it contains two of my current favorite things: the pants and the bag. Isn't it an absolute arm/eye candy?

            

Well, that's all I have for now. But I can assure that there is more to come!

Would appreciate more ideas from your side as well :)

Love:

Sepo

October 2020

While this entire year has been a blur, the month of October for some reason was exceptionally quite small. Like one moment, I was here planning winter feasts, writting about something nice for the blog. And the very next moment I take a look at the calender and somehow it's October 31st. I was on the verge of loosing my only resolution this year - the one of writing 12 posts, one for each month. 

Somehow I have managed to keep up with the challenge, with a couple of good posts and some mediocre ones. I kept the blog alive.

I had planned a lot of stuff and ideas. However nothing concrete came out of it. And this month was like crazy busy with work. I am almost clocking in 13- 14 hours every day. My entire schedule has been royally fucked. I am hardly getting any exercise, which is like really bad for my hormonal health. I am hardly making any tasty food. Hell, I am hardly finding time to eat and there's hardly any scope of inspiration in this routine whatsoever for writing. The reading has hitten a slow-down as well. I managed to read through only a couple of pages before dozing off. Hopefully next month should be better. And with so many festivals coming up, it better be!

October is really one of my favorite months, right after the birthday month of February. There is so much anticipation surrounding this month. So many festivals. More often than not there is also always some or the other wedding surrounding this time. Starting with navratri, then Dusshera, closely followed by karvachauth and then finally diwali and bhaidooj-0. I love how the markets are bustling during this time. The lights, exhibitions and that lovely nip in the year. It just smells so delicious.

This year ofcourse is like no other. All the above mentioned activities have either not been done or done with not the usual flare. I missed dressing up in colours for Navratri the most. And the big dandiya nights. Hopefully upcoming festivals though spent safely from home should be a bit better and exciting nontheless.

There is also a very disheartening news of some third wave of corona virus. Don't know when this shit will be over and thinks will be back to normals. However everything said and done, this time period from March to now has definitely taught many lessons. By the way writing about lessons learned from corona and quarantine was also one of the topic I has decided on to write for the blog! But then since it's just not ending, I am not really sure how many more lessons are there in store.

So maybe sometime next month or year! Gosh can you believe it's almost 2021. Sometimes I still feel it's March, the normal times right after which the world as we knew it changed, and how!

Here's hoping for things to get normal and soon.

Till then,

Stay home and safe guys!

Love:

Sepo

The Social Media Detox

September was a quest to stay away from the social media. To say I am addicted to my phone would be an understatement. What I have with my phone is something beyond addiction. This inexplicable need to touch and open my phone at regular intervals and just mindlessly browse through these different social media applications. Sometimes catch an episode of two of the current series that I follow. If you may ask, these days its the re-runs of The Big Bang Theory and Rotten on Netflix. I am really happy that my education was during a period when we were still kind of untouched with the plethora of these distracting mediums available now. However, during my college days – the Facebook craze was at its peak! So, I dutifully deactivated my Facebook 1 week prior to my semester exams and activated it right after coming back from writing my last exam. This sort of self-discipline worked very well for me back then.  

All those working in IT sector would agree that studying and elevating your skills here is a never-ending exercise. Now after cooking, baking, embroidery, other hidden hobbies and all the other quarantine mandate things – it was time for learning some new things in the professional capacity. When I sat down to prepare a plan – I realized that the only way I can manage to fit in sometime for studies is if my some magic I am able to increase the duration of a day from 24 hours to say 26 or 28. Considering the impracticality of that idea I quickly took a dive into the activities of the day and identify the leakages – majority of which where identified to be associated with the phone and the universe of social media it beholds. I hastily decided to do what I did back in college. I deactivated my Facebook and uninstalled Instagram and Pinterest – the major applications I spent my time on according to the statistics on my phone.

The withdrawal symptoms kicked in as soon as I uninstalled the apps. I lost the count of how many times I switched on my phone and scrolled towards the place where Instagram and Pinterest used to be. I had given myself at least 1 week of no FB, Insta time. The first few days were hard. I remember clicking pictures of the food I was having and saving them for later use. But after few days the exercise seemed futile and honestly a bit silly. I mean I heard a voice inside me which said “Bro, just eat the damn thing, no one cares about your picture”. Haha. So, during the one week I did manage to study a bit – which made the exercise a little bit successfully. I also devoured Anne Patchett’s The Dutch House, William Dalrymple’s City of Djinns which made me fall a wee bit love with Delhi (but more on that in one of the next 3 posts remaining for this year). I also started and still reading Chimamanda Adichie’s Half of a Yellow Sun. This woman is fast becoming one of my most favorite authors. Someone who's books I can blindly order without having to read the jest or the reviews. Although I do find her leading ladies a bit flawed and ridiculously similar, but I am ready to overlook that for the other little things she so nails down in her stories.  

An interesting book can help you overcome anything. For me, these three books did the trick. Watching the documentary Social Dilemma further resolved my detox to be extended by the end of the month. TBH, after the strict first week, I did cheat a bit by accessing the applications via the web. But blame it on the interfaces, the time spend was negligible. Also, Chimamanda ensured that any remaining time I had left from work, study, daily chores and reading was spend extensively reading and researching about Nigeria. The Hausa, Igbo and Yoruba tribes. The Nigerian Civil War. And the recipes for Jollof Rice, Fufu’s and Fried Plantains. By the way I have really perfected my research on jollof rice and I am definitely making it next month. Next month because IT MOST DEFINITELY NEEDS TO BE INSTAGRAMMED RIGHT?

My closing thoughts on this topic would be – social media is a necessary evil. Necessary because it gives you so much information. I love the history, book, home décor and the foodie pages I follow on my Instagram. I love those tiny little baby chef pages. I love how some girl will take the pain of creating a video on the best nude lipstick shades for Indian skin tone and looking at it I can just order the one I like reducing my research time. Oh and the memes. I missed the meme pages the most. But how much you want it to dictate your life is in your hands – like literally. The trick is to find a middle ground and not get swayed by mindless browsing. I am still trying to find my middle ground. When I feel I am browsing way too much I simply get up eat a fruit, get hold of my book, study something, apply a face pack or go bug my husband for his unfolded laundry.

All in all, I really liked this social media detox. I may make it a regular feature once a month.

Also, I got a nice blog post out of it, so a win win.

Stay cautious of the Social Media Peeps!

So long.

Love:

Sepo

 

The Rundown: August 2020

It’s going to be a lean post this month.

It has been a crazy last few week. With tight schedule at work and parents visiting, add to that several festivals – I hardly had any moments of peace with myself to introspect. I did not even have a topic in mind to at least formulate something in my mind if not on the paper. Also, I was reading this book called A house without windows by Nadia Hashimi. Since it was based out of Afghanistan – the description, story-line, food, locales, characters – everything reminded me of Thousand Splendid Suns. Now if you have been reading this blog for long, you would know my obsession with Afghanistan, Mariam and Laila. I have written about it here, here, here, here, here and here. Yes, yes, yes – it was/is a huge obsession.

So, any minuscule time that I managed to get in-between all the other madness was spent in reading. I am not complaining though. I had a gala time reading the book. Of course, it’s no Thousand Splendid Suns but good. Also, I had a very disturbing experience of someone copying stuff from my writings. Yet again. This time however it was not at blatant as the previous one. Sneakier and smartly done. In a way that even though I know it has been taken from my blog, I still can’t point my finger to it. And that has just made me so sad. Angry first. But later just sad.

Of late I have seen multiple Instagram posts alleging or complaining about how their content/ideas/posts have been copied by popular Instagram influencers. Since these influencers have large standing and high number of followers, their content and words are taken at face value. And somehow the new budding creator has his/her wings cut. Now, a lot of people are of the opinion that imitation is a form of flattery or they will just throw a “grow a pair” at you, or even dare to ask you to grow a thicker skin. But trust me – it’s a lot easier said than done.

For a creative person there is nothing as devastating as finding someone stealing and posing your work as his own. I fail to understand what makes people to do this. Why would yourself to be a copy of someone, why not be an original? What drives me crazy is when educated people indulge in this deplorable behavior. I am sure all of us knowingly or unknowingly have many a times copied an image from the internet and used it in our documents or presentations. I have many a times done the same. However off late I make it a point to mention the website links wherever possible. If I like something on Instagram, rather than taking a screenshot and saving it for myself, I share it online giving due credit and link to the artist’s profile. I really wish people would respect the content one dares to share online.

I had all these things going on in my mind this month, hence I was unable to write or invest time on anything else. I have decided to maintain a low profile for now. Go easy on the online sharing for my blog. It has always been a very private space and I now intend to keep it that way at least for some time.

Hopefully next month would be a good post month!

Till then so long.

Love:
Sepo