Confessions of a Serial Dieter [Read:Cheater]

Welcome to the diary of a Serial Dieter Cheater

If you have been following my blog for some time, you may already be aware of my constant ramblings about my weight-y issues. On how after shifting by base from my hometown I somehow started to pile up on fat. Initially it was more like an endearing even funny thing for me. Like “Wow, such a lot of weight in such a small span of time”. So, even though I was aware at some corner that this is not good I refused to throw any light on that corner.

What really started pinching were the comments like “You have gained so much weight”, “You look really fat”. But the worst shock was finding that the old clothes don't fit anymore. My pretty dresses all made useless by newly gained chubbiness. All this and the thought of my being unattractive was probably my first motivation to start exercising. So I started this 10-15 minutes of exercising routine consisting of a mix-up of simple stretching, a little aerobics and some skipping. The entire thing made me very happy and proud. However it did not do me much good because I am not a morning person, I have my alarm system arranged in such a manner that I have just enough time to get ready and go. So squeezing time for exercise between this tight schedule became tough many a times. And to add to it, I was still a mindless eater gorging of cheese burst pizza's and other junkies.

The exercise routine soon got worn off because of reasons varying from morning shifts to laziness and things got back to where they started. The next bout of inspiration came from the book called “Confessions of a serial Dieter” by Kalie Puri. I read the book with an appetite of a hungry wolf and immediately (read: mindlessly) started to plan out for my very own crash diet. The drama continued for a full week, with me starving myself in the name of diet. Needless to say by the end of the week I was seriously ill and on the receiving end of a lot of agony from friends and foes. I must say here that even though the diet had adverse effects on my health, I did not feel hungry during the entire week (and I am a constant munch-er people). I guess it had to do with the faith I had kept in the diet and of course the resolve to get thin. But sadly, as smoothly I fell into the routine of diet I jumped out of it just as efficiently. This time though a little cautious of what I eat.

The next step taken was that of brisk walking. As mentioned earlier, my non affinity toward mornings made me the brisk evening walker. I religiously followed the routine and even managed to reduce 1 Kg along the way. But sadly this too had a lifespan of about a week only. I went to home after that then lost the touch and that was the end of the brisk walking or any other kind of physical exertion.

This did not mean that I was done and happy. In fact I became more conscious of the way I look with each passing day. But somehow I lost that enthu and zeal, mainly due to the super slow results. I want something that gives me fast results. I know that anything that promises to do that is unhealthy but I guess I am just tired and bored. Being a hardcore foodie, another habit that goes against me is that for any achievement that I have made, e.g loosing 1 Kg of weight I feel like I owe it to myself with a reward of deep fried junkies. Bad habit but oh-so-difficult to erase

New conjuncture is that of Yoga. I have joined classes on weekends and learned the basics but then again I fail to practice regularly. Even my classes are spent controlling my giggles when my teacher adorns funny aasans and modulates her voice in a very funny squeaky tone, apparently to provide a calming effect. Far from calming me it make me more restless than ever.

But it is here today that I make a promise with myself to eat less junk. Exercise more, walk more, reduce the intake of coffee and aerated drinks. And last but not the least practice what my yog guru teaches me without making fun or finding anything remotely funny about it.

Amen

The Curious Case of SMALL TALK !

Life is full of situations and times wherein you find yourself in awkward and uncomfortable spot. Like being at a party where you don't know anyone. Some people will strike a conversation and start to gel up with people. But there will always be someone who will be sitting in a corner sipping his drink and looking super jaded. There are situations which often demand for striking a conversation. These conversations are far from interesting or productive. They are nothing but a pain in the ass for both the parties. Mostly weather or monosyllables these conversations hardly contribute in building any kind of relation.

There are some special situations or places wherein people automatically assume that a small talk needs to be initiated. It may not be required per se but the deliberation involved is highly comical. I have tried and dissected some situations and places where people generally fall into the trap of small talk.

Beauty Parlors: If you a lady, I am sure you will vouch for this one. This is THE place for the small talk. The lady waxing your legs would want to know all about your daily schedule. This girl I went to for waxing wanted to know all about my attire right from my hair band to shoes. With the kind of pain she was inflicted on me, I wanted to do anything but talk. She refused to take hints from my monosyllables and battered on about how she could never carry the red pants I was wearing. 

The ladies waiting in queue too will join the bandwagon and pass on their comments on issues unimportant as say passing a comment on which hairstyle will suit a fellow client totally unrelated to you.  

Lifts: Just for record, your being in a small room with a stranger does not obligate you to initiate a bombardment of questions. You enter; we smile, press the buttons and then wait in utter silence until the destination is reached. This should be the ideal scenario provided you don’t know each other personally. In case you do know each other personally, well there are way better things to do than just talk. Like shouting at the top of your voice, checking the echo of the sound and of course making stupid faces in the mirror. Just in case you are a stranger you obviously don’t qualify to do the above mentioned but at the same time you don’t need to pry and start asking personal questions. I have a habit of keeping my id card on till the time I reach my room; this unfortunately has been on several occasions the focal point of many small talks initiated like “Oh Xyz Company”? “Great, so how much do they pay you?” (Yes! That direct) “So you must be leaving in a PG, which floor?” “What are your working hours, we can share an auto sometime?”:O

While some people do look out for opportunities to initiate conversation others do so merely to avoid being rude. All I have to say it just smile or say hello and that’s that. More than enough.

The Third Person Scenario: This happens when there is a common link between two strangers. If god forbid that common link has to somehow for even a short duration of time go away, awkward is a very subtle word to describe the situation between the left out strangers. Uncomfortable and nervous smiles quickly give way to the conversation starters like “So, where did you say you work?”  Both the parties know that the job profile is a topic of least concern what so ever but what else can be done in the silent moments of torment.

 

Travel Trauma: This includes your daily commute in public transports or even long distance traveling. People waiting next to you in the bus stop will always want to know “You have waiting since how long” how exactly that matters I have never really understood. The person sitting next to you will also try and ask something and if not they will make sure to peek suggestively whenever you type anything in your cell phone or open your bag. This one uncleji  sitting next to me in plane wanted to know in full blown details about where I was coming from and where I would be going, who would pick me up from the airport and how am I related to them. But yea I am forever indebted to him as he helped me when my phone fell and slide under the seats during plane landing while I fake slept to avoid his questions.  He called up all the air hostesses and made quite a scene out of the situation but not before giving  me a sound hearing of how careless I have been and what-all-could –have-happened lecture, thus embarrassing me further.

Office: Office conversations are all the more tricky before well, its office. You need to keep a lot of things in mind before you even try and initiate a smile. Any sort of personal intervenes is strictly a no-no. So, this conversation will mostly focus of your quintessential technologies, market, financial results and profits. This is the most dreaded conversation in my list simply because I suck at it. I make it a point to appear aloof and if the situation demands just smile. 

I am sure there are many other situations and scenarios but I am really tired read bored of analyzing and over analyzing them all with the scrutiny of a CBI official. I hope you like the concoction and have as much fun reading it as I had writing it (before it got all boring :P)

Though it did help me in creating a list of topics to be included in small talk

1. Weather

2. Sports

3. Economy

4. Music

5. Movies

6. Filmstars

7. Crime

8. Governement

9. Food

10. Mobile Models

Haah, 10 topics, not at all bad :-)

Love

Sepo

Sitcoms, Stuff & Me

This post has been heavily inspired by the back to back episodes of various series that I follow.The more I watch them, greater is the effect they have on me . The independence, the friendship and the fun just gets you so high. I remember when I started watching friends I got so crazy that I started fantasizing about what if I lived in that show. Initially I was Rachael (because she is the character I relate to the most) but then I became a Indian friend to the group. I spent days and nights thinking about how the story would continue with my presence and whether I would hook-up with Joey or Ross. Sounds Crazy, I know, but this is the kind of affect it had on me.

Now, at this stage in my life when I am living alone and away from home. These shows are all the more appealing and realistic. I can totally relate to Rachel, the super-spoilt Daddy's girl-turned-into-smart-independent-woman. Apart from Rachel, other fictional characters I relate to are Jerry Seinfeld from Seinfeld and Carrie Bradshaw from SATC. Jerry with his weird friends and neighbors. I am not very neighbor friendly but I have had my share of weird roommates. The only aspect of Carrie that I relate to is her passion for writing.I can kill for a job like her. A column for a newspaper, though not on the same topic as hers.

Apart the the independence and the style, what I really dig is the relationship portrayed between the friends. They are like family and the only support system in the big bad world. The kind of friends you can share your dark dirty secret without the fear of them being judgmental. I am grateful for each person in my life who has given me the same kind of love and trust. They say good things happen to good people. If this is true then I must have done some really good stuff in my past lives to have been bestowed with a great bunch of angels I call friends.

I need a lot of time to actually trust a person. I am friendly no doubt but to really expose my emotions, I need a lot of time. Somehow I don't feel comfortable telling people about myself. Even my closest friends would not know many a things about me. I guess I picked up this trait from my dad who too is very secretive by nature. He always says "The lesser you speak, lesser will be the amount of nonsense uttered". This virtue is imbibed so well in me that my friends usually have this complain of how I never speak out and share. There are less than a handful of people in my world with whom I can dare to open up my heart and be the real me :-)

I thank God dearly for them. They are reason behind the person I am. They have been directly or indirectly responsible for helping me cope up with crisis and distress. They have witnessed me at my best and the worst. The patient recipients of my crying fit calls and mood swings. The advice givers behind my numerous costume changes every morning. The unlucky ones who I drag along for the dangerous obsession I call shopping. The patient answers for the same questions I ask five hundred forty times. The ones who survive my cooking. The ones who put up with me when I act like a 5 year old. The one who still be friends with me when I shout and sing randomly at movie theaters. 

Well, you may be thinking that as a person I am quite dramatic and theatrical. But you know what I don't care about anything as long as  I have the magic beans (from Jack and the bean stalk) who make life worth living.

P.S I know this post is neither here nor there. Doesn't make much sense but I am suffering from such a writer's block that whatever is coming on my fingers, I am just typing away.

P.P.S Rendezvous just turned 3 on December 19. Due to the whole Delhi Rape incident I did not want to go into the whole celebration mode with a special post like every year. So this time the hapiness of coming this far is just kept inside. But yea like I always say this would never have been possible without your support.3 years of blogging has given me more that 100 followers and some very dear friends across geographies. What more could I have asked for.

Lots of Love:
SePo